Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Being Separated (January 1998)

For Pipke - November 1997 started off very well. 
We had a beautiful Autumn and it was already freezing. She had no problem with the cold. She had developed a good fat layer and - if she wasn't sleeping in her dogs nest/bed she spent most of her time swimming in her little pond. 
In between she enjoyed walking through the garden together with us to search after spiders and earthworms.
She now weighed almost two kg.
It was at the end of December, and the last few months I hadn't been feeling so good.
I always felt exhausted and I had become very skinny. (I barely weighed 49 kg!) Normally I ran every other day *9 km (*at that time) and now suddenly I even couldn't run one km. 
I got so bad, that I almost couldn't stay awake, I slept the whole day.
The week before, I had consulted my doctor and she had taken blood samples to find out what my problem was.
Very late on New Year's eve, she phoned me with the urgent message that I had to go immediately to the hospital the next morning.
My blood samples showed that I had probably had an internal bleeding.
My first thought was: “oh, and what about Pipke”!
I didn't think about myself! I was only worried for what an impact my absence would have on Pipke and, my doctor couldn't estimate how long I had to stay there.

With pain in my heart I left home to go to the hospital in the early morning that New Years day.
On the way to the hospital I couldn't stop crying because I had to leave Pipke behind.
Although I had not much time - the first thing I did when I entered my hospital room was to install  Pipke's picture on my night table. 
Thereafter - without delay - they took me immediately to the examination room.
I had to undergo many tests and the doctors gave me a full examination, but after a full day of examinations they couldn't find out what was wrong with me. 
The only thing that they could say was - that my blood results were very bad.  
They were sure that I must have had an internal bleeding – but they couldn't find out “where” it happened .
I stayed at the hospital for a whole month, I was only allowed to spend just one weekend home and that only after fourteen days.
When I then came back home after a fourth night - Pipke ignored me completely when she saw me again - it seemed like, to her, I didn't exist anymore.
She even didn't answer when I called for her – she wanted no more snuggles – it seemed as if she was angry with me. She remained cool and impassive.
In fact, this event touched me more than the fact that I was sick.
It even made me feel much worse.
When I had to leave her to go to the hospital again, I was really gloomy: would she forget about me now – was she angry with me because I had left her against my own will?
That same day I had to undergo once more several examinations at the hospital. 
I went through all kind of scanners – I became a real Guinea pig – my body was turned inside out in a manner of speaking.
Now – they had discovered that my blood results had even deteriorated after that weekend that I was at home, and behind my back they had asked my husband: 
"maybe your wife mutilates herself” ? That would declare the blood loss.
(This shows how medical science works these days.) 
If they can't find anything, then it's all in your head.
In fact, this shows rather their inability to cure “everything” and then they come up with the easiest – but not proven – explanation.
My husband was really furious, and I – I knew now “why” they had inspected my arms, my legs and every single spot on my body so thoroughly. 
They were actually looking for “cut wounds”, but of course - they couldn't find even one tiny scar! I didn't cut myself.
Maybe it was good that my blood results were bad, otherwise – they had maybe said that I was a "hypochondriac".
After one whole month being hospitalized I was allowed to go home without an explanation for my blood loss, and until this moment it's still a mystery!
(I had to take very strong iron pills for almost 6 months and it took me also that long to recover before I was able to function normally.)
It felt so good to be back home now. I had missed Pipke so much – but she still ignored me a little. I spent as much time with her as I could  to regain her love for me – and little by little – our bond grew again - even closer than ever before.
I knew now – how it had felt “to have no choice but to miss her”.
Now I knew that she made my life complete.

Due to my illness we didn't take pictures that year! 
Even no picture of Pipke - and that's something that I now still regret.

So - I can't show you much - only these two snapshots taken out the 
*film (*see below) which was taken in December 1998. 
It are the only images of us both that were taken that year - 
the year that I came to the conclusion that 
she was 
"My True Love"!

Wasn't she a sweetie!

I want to close this chapter with this love scene of us both!
I hope you will enjoy it.

Next time we will go further with: Help....Robbers!
We hope you will be there to discover who the rascals are.
Bye, bye!
Till soon.

PS: click on the link above to watch the film images.
Thanks for reading. Thanks for watching!


  1. that must have been so very scary! a month in the hospital is such a long time!! and how awful to have pipke so upset :(

  2. I agree, how very frightening! It is amazing that the doctors never did find out what the problem was! There are so many things which affect us in so many different ways; it is sometimes truly impossible to find out what is going on. I am so sorry that you were ignored by Pipke; how frustrating to not be able to explain to her the reason for your absence!
    Anyway, thank you for the post. :)